The early parts of this novel are...difficult to explain. I would commend the writing, its not bad and I think flows very well. The characters are defined well and I can easily picture them apart from one another. But I honestly barely care whats going on. I'm just slightly above feeling bored. I don't know what a term for that is, but it's still good enough to get through it at a reasonable pace but it feels like I'm just watching a well narrated political documentary or something. So it's not so much a fault of the book as more so this plot just isn't my thing.
Most critical reviews deem the writing really bad, I really can't speak on that as I'm not very versed in writing myself, but I would recommend she find a great editor for the sequel if that many people point it out.
It was pretty odd to see actually that MOST of the glowing positive reviews are beta readers. It's why I want to write a more critical review and hope to become a beta reader for her sequel because I really want Elliot to succeed and write some great characters.
That's going to be the theme I'm tackling in my review and discussion, she says this is a character driven novel, which is a huge problem for me because I don't too much care for most of the characters.
In a character-driven story, the plot is used to develop the character. Many readers love character-driven stories because the author tends to put a premium on developing realistic, flawed, and human characters. Readers can see themselves or someone they love in these characters and, as a result, connect emotionally. I didn't feel like these characters developed at all. They were the same at the beginning as they were at the end, the only thing that changed was where they were at in the world and where the plot took them. I feel like this should have been a sequel as we missed ALOT of the characters growth and plot before the novel started.
For instance:
There was a war that should help us understand the leaders. (Gerard, Pierre)
There was a revolution of a nation from slavery.
Theres a relationship between Gwen and Roland that is DEFINITELY their main plot even though the romance isnt supposed to be, but I disagree.
Dorian is the adopted son/ambassador to his nation.
Dietrich is a prince assassin/ fiend hunter.
Abaddon is a brilliant potion maker/ alchemist.
Xodia was sheltered and alone on her island.
Theres a bunch of elites and soldiers with intense backstories.
ALL OF THIS IS NOT IN THE BOOK. This is all told to us and has already happened. Im sorry, Im sure it would have been frustrating to do but I would have put a full stop on this novel and told Elliot DO NOT make this your first book!
Honestly, ALL of this stuff is far more interesting than whats in this novel, and would Peace and Turmoil would have been a fine second novel if I had known and lived through all this back story.
I will go into full explanation and critique of characters toward the end in spoiler discussion. I wanted to get to some of the smaller non character related complaints.
-The magic system/ powers is unique in how its written. Seeing colors and pulling on it to control elements. But besides that its uninteresting and unimaginative. The explanation and power-creep or build up of the powers in non existent. The way they get exhausted, how often and by how much doesn't seem consistent or attended to. It also feels odd how just ANYONE can use any of the elements, no one seems to have a focus or affinity. X'odia is supposed to be really powerful, I think Gwen is too, or shes just unable to control her temper which fluctuates her powers? Furthermore, the fighting with the power is not interesting or unique either, its just throwing a ice spear here, pull up roots there, none of the way they use the powers is written to make me excited for it. This wouldn't necessarily be bad if its not the focus, but since the rest of the book doesnt hold up well this is just disappointing.
-The creatures or "fiends" were praised by some people in the books. Again, kind of uninteresting and just felt like typical monsters and nothing to even really bring up. Besides some of the creatures, they were supposed to have some affinity to the Auroras but it wasnt really elaborated on. We dont know where they come from, why theyre different from other animals? (I would go on to say why they can be controlled and such but its not important here and probably will be in the next book)
-Time and communication seemed off. They seemed to be able to move and communicate too quickly for their distance. I have no idea how long any time took. And there were some HUGE time/ scene skip grievances that just had people showing up. Mostly seen with Dietrich, which I will discuss in his spoilers.
-I liked the little excerpts at the beginning of each chapter. I would have found a better way to format them, because they aren't pretty. But it soon dawns very quickly that each one is a "foreshadow" of the coming chapter. Which is interesting if its add something to the world like its magic, but then it straight up gives away whats going to happen next.
One is about how suicide works in the world, so you know in this chapter someones going to commit suicide. One is about a guys letter to his wife and as soon as he gets home they're going to run away and take care of their baby shes pregnant with. Can you guess what going to happen to this man....?
It kind of takes any surprise or emotional impact away in a book that already struggles to set up emotional and impactful moments with this full too-full cast.
I almost think a very easy solution would be to put these at the END of the chapter so you think, (oh wow, that guys must have really struggled with his suicide or. damn, thats sad that guy wont care for his new born baby etc..)
-Brooks isnt known for liking romance. So I was confused and dissapointed when a heavy amount of her characters not only have romantic partners/ plots, but focuses on it alot.
-I'm not sure if there is a general standard on how to format and when to use italics, but I grew to dislike them. She italicizes her magic words. Aurora, called and even non magic touched. I mainly dont like this because when I read Italics I put emphases on the words, and read them differently. Im pretty sure she just does it to show shes talking about her magic, but not like we should be emphasizing them. Secondly I dont know why she has to italicize called weapons, which are just normal weapons not conjured my magic. (Im feel like making sure all the right "touched" words were italicized would have been really annoying lol)
-Finally, the world. I already discussed how alot of the history of the world is just talked about and we know nothing about it. But the world just isn't interesting, could have been fixed if we lived through more of these events. I liked how we get an image of the map so we know where people are before each chapter. But I REALLY hope she gets a new map for the sequel. The places we focus on are RIGHT in the center of the book so it hardly helps. It also doesnt clearly define the borders in a book that has a bunch of the nations fighting each other, so it seems important. I also couldnt tell where alot of the cities were so it made the whole distance thing alot harder. I was so confused by the places that I thought Riverdee WAS the capital of Xenith, and was really confused why Xodia seemed to not be in the capital when an event happened, and Mesidias elites went PAST Xenth to go to Riverdee for some reason. I dont know, it just was kind of a mess. Needs an updated map and better explanation of the world.
Ok, wow, that was lot and Im technically only have finished. Again since the book is supposed to be character driven, lets discuss these characters. This is complete spoilers for the entirety of their arcs.
Mesidia - Probably one of my favorites, and their people got completely screwed over lol It's really the central conflict of the book.
I really hated this whole plot because it just seemed annoying. Their back story is there are two families who believe they should have the throne. Only one of the do, the Leighless. The Victorians are the others, but they are on semi-peaceful terms with them I guess? I mean their heir Natalia goes with them. But at the same time there are "rebels" or something for the Victorians? I dont know, hardly matters soon as the plot gets going. So the book starts and they send some diplomats to Xenith to negotiate in "Peace" talks. During that time everyone gets attacked by fiends. Mesidia is attacked by fiends controlled by Victorian Duchess, so they capture and imprison her. She gives some exposition on the bad guys, or atleast her background. (Youll notice I wont talk alot about the bad guys, they were far and few between and kind of confusing, plus its character driven, the characters on their own should be able to hold up the book.) Anyway, so after this for some reason NOONE in Xenith and the peace talks believe that the Duchess can control them? (I guess they're just like, "Well you hated her, so you used this as a reason to take her?" Or something....as if they werent busy defending themselves?) Also Roland saw the Duchess kill her husband...for some reason, I dont remember if there was one, or if it was a good one. So yeah, since she was captured the Victorian rebels now want to have a civil war? The countries around Mesidia dont want a civil war because it will effect their money...k, I guess thats fine. But then think that the Victorians should lead, so they make a treaty and are basically forcing the Leighless to surrender and release control to the Victorians. I have no idea why...its kind of ridiculous they just dont believe that the Duchess did what they said with absolutely NO communication and shouldnt have any authority to tell them what to do. THEN our great "King of Peace" agrees against the Leighless...like what? (Ill get to him later.) So the Leighless go on the run and adopted son Dorian and Elizabeth go back to Mesidia to make the Leighless surrender. But the Leighless are dead and the Duchess is alive...and then they blame Gwen because they think Dietrich did it...and thats the last we hear of them. I actually didnt realize how much I hated this until I had to explain it lol.
Pierre- I can pretty much just rope him in with Gerard. He's the leader and best friends with Gerard. I dont like him, we pretty much just see him cruel to his son early on. Then cruel to Xodia. Then we get a good moment with him feeling really conflicted on how he cant let the Duchess take over because shes even more cruel than him and chooses to sacrifice himself to kill the Duchess. But then he and everyone but the Duchess are murdered by the shapeshifter dressed as Dietrich. (Which may I point out is COMPLETELY irrelevant. I assume the Duchess is on the same side of the shapeshifter or atleast hiring him, so making him look like Dietrich in the novel is ONLY a red herring to the reader because the Duchess could literally had said anything and I guess theyll believe her...unlike when they didnt the Leighless lol)
The AlMurtaghs- None of them are really of note except Elizabeth. Who I liked at first. She just the sweet nice person. But then irrationally thinks that Gwen set all of them up or something...she even thinks its odd that Gwen would convince Roland to give the dagger to Dietrich instead of Dorian. Unless she straight up doesnt believe Gwen when she says Dietrich helped save Xenith it makes sense to reward him, and why would Dorian want the dagger anyway? This happened before we knew the Leighless would lose power or that Elizabeth would be the betrothed so we still had no idea why Dorian should have it. It was just an annoying last minute change of heart and jump of logic to fuel drama. Alot of her character was how she felt toward Dorian.
Dorian- Again we really needed his backstory to see how he worked as their son. He seemed to hardly matter, didnt seem like their son, and I think its shitty he turned on his family. Thats all I got to say. Alot of his character was how he was with Natalia, and now hes betrothed to Elizabeth...and apparently seems to actually like her which wasnt set up on his end and leaves me confused.
Natalia - I hated her, I literally didnt know what to make of her. She flipped flopped alot, I thought it interesting how Gerard made her a ward of Xenith so she wouldnt be pulled into the Mesidia civil war. But then she honored Gerard by framing his daughter for his death so yeah...shes a pretty shitty person and Gerard is still proven to make TERRIBLE choices.
Roland- He was actually my favorite. Which is funny because hes not even technically a main character. (He didnt even get official character art by Brooks, how sad.) None of his actions actively annoyed me, I was always on his side. I think it was completely RIDICULOUS that Brooks did not write the scene he gave away the dagger. I literally cant fathom why she didn't put that in. I barely already could care less about these magical objects and she didnt even write how it was when Roland gave it away. I feel like the action initially started with Roland, and I thought it odd. Its weird because it took a while to get to the action, but once we got to it I feel like it wasn't set up enough. I think she focused on the wrong build up. Of course his general story was how he cant be with Gwen because he has the dagger and now he can get rid of it. Im also confused as to why he went all the way to Riverdee (which is past Xenith) and didnt stop to see Gwen? I feel like this plot was only set up to create drama and spark the central plot. I want to reiterate here we dont know these two as a couple, we hardly care, we REALLY need see them before the book.
Xenith-
Overall fairly uninteresting. We barely know anything about it except I guess its an almost Utopia area ruled by the "King Of Peace" Except RIGHT at the very end Gerard reveals some more info about the War of Fire and It makes me even more troubled as to how this kingdom got to be so great...
Alot of time is focused here, but not alot happens I feel. Its the center of the controversy over Mesidia as the rulers of the 5 kingdoms around Mesidia get together and determine that another kingdom should surrender to their usurpers...lets just get into it.
Gerard- I really hated him, I didnt see any of the "King of Peace" that he should be known for, he seemed like a bad king and a worst father. I mean...with the way it was written at one point he literally punched his daughter in the face and knocked her out. If ANYONE needed a backstory before this book it was this guy. I didn't believe anything about him.
I dont understand why he agreed with the treaty of 5 to go against the Leighless, and basically side with the Vicotorians to go to WAR against the Leighless WITHOUT PEACE TALKS? I dont care what these people wanted, its not up to them to NOT believe a kingdom and determine who rules it. THEN not only that but he just lets the Prianthians or whoever, decide WHAT to do with XENITHS PRINCESS! Holy crap was I so frustrated by the injustices done to Gwen and Mesidia that Gerard just allowed! He made so many many mistakes. I dont think him and his son Adan talked at all the entire book, so I hope we werent supposed to, you know...feel anything for them.
I did find it interesting that it was set up how he would die of natural causes and his dumbass was so secretive about it that only the Leighless and Natalias knight knew about it. So when he died Natalia framed Gwen because if not she would look like the culprit, its laughable how stupid his mistakes are. (It frustrates me but its not necessarily bad writing, just his set up to make him believable as a great ruler is) But thats why it doesnt make sense that OTHER people just determined what to do with Gwen when she was Weeks (in this case DAYS) from being the ruler after Gerard died. What an Idiot. Easily the most frustrating and worst character in the book.
Guinevere- I didnt care for her at first. Much like Dietrich I feel like she was too edgy and hot headed to start off with. I think the injustices to her made me like her, nothing she herself did. Shes I suppose a confident/ competent fighter. I actually like how we got glimpses of the leader she could be. (But the battle of fiends scene was kind of a mess) I really liked when she finally told Natalia to simmer the f*** down because she wouldn't shut up. She showed intellect and political maneuvering with some strategy, better than her dad, who HONESTLY was her biggest enemy in this book... Shes the main one Im interested to follow in book two and why Im very keen to be a beta reader, I really want to help Brooks bring this character to light and make her great. (I like how they eventually brought back the blond hair herbs from the beginning. I was wondering if that was relevant)
Sadie-
This whole place and its people just make me sigh....nothing overall really happens here, just the characters, so lets get to them.
Dietrich- Of the "main cast" of young people he's by far my least favorite. Not only do I not like his character, but he had the WORST flow and pacing. In the beginning it was just difficult to follow.
He is basically two people, a fiend hunter under another name and an Assassin Prince who kills the rebels/ usurpers. AGAIN, we NEEDED to see this before his story picked up. It hardly seems relevant besides the fact that I guess the shapeshifter uses it against him because he "assassinates" people I dont know...He had alot to do in part one and I didnt like most of it.
He goes BY HIMSELF across the land? Gets attacked. Has sex, gets some information while internally monologueing how annoyed he is, has more sex. Then gets attacked by a dragon and keeps throwing up in some guys hut....Deitrichs chapters were the longest and I desperately wanted them to be over. (also small gripe, his scene splitter/ time jumps are separated by a fancy pick ax? Why? Bc hes traveling through a mountain? Should've been his crossbow or something)
As I mentioned above, his pacing is almost offensive. He spends way too much time at the Dragon Hut, then once the Dragon agrees to help him, the next time we see him hes just POOF in Xenith. He helps kill a Behemoth in the Attack of Fiends. Which is actually pretty cool but I would have liked to know more about it. Apparently it was just chilling in a lake in the Xenith capital, sounds creepy but interesting. Wish it was set up better, like ancient stories or legends about it.
As luck would have it Gwen agrees with Dietrichs idea about the dagger and POOF hes in Mesidia where we get a VERY lame and anti-climatic scene where he gets the dagger Offscreen and POOF hes back in the mountains. Although now for some reason so much time has passed that the insurgent/ rebels/ whatever they are have completely taken over and VERY unceremoniously and gruesomely killed the dragon guy and the young dragon we spent all that time watching be nursed back to health. Anyway, then his brother shows up and stabs him with the Dagger of Eve for some reason (Ill get to that in Abbadons part) and thats the last we hear of him...OR IS IT? (Apparently hes alive.)
I completely believe Brooks when she says she wrote this before reading Sanderson, and that she hasnt read Eragon, but this basically felt like Kaladin met Saphira and they ran off together. Alot of people liked Seera, the Dragon, she was fine, but kind of forgot about her by the end because she didnt show up for the last 40% of the book.
Harold- Hes not a major character but I thought Id point out another bad leader. Again, we couldve gained alot if we saw him when he liberated his people from slavery...then his wife dies and decides not only to KILL HIMSELF, but make his son do it. So you know...who cares about your children, or your country, your wife is dead, so yeah...great guy.
Abbadon- wow....this guy. At first unassuming, but interesting. Im a sucker for medical type people, and his alchemy seemed cool. I thought the idea that HE was the one making his mother sick in order to get his brother to go get the dagger of eve so his country would be...powerful? was interesting. But the setup and reveal was insanely lack luster. It also reveals him and his dad are pretty cruel people killing whoever. But then a page later he chooses not to kill this random woman...Im not sure why. I barely knew him as a non murderer, then barely knew him as a murderer before all this happened so...whatever I guess. But then the next we get of him he just murders his brother with the dagger and thats it...hes the king of his country...yay? (I'm wondering if she never originally wrote Abaddons point of view but BetaReaders didnt understand or thought he needed to be in it more to make the ending pay off so she went in and revised it.)
I can only assume he's scared of death, so terrified he went to these lengths to protect himself? There is ALOT of back and forth between him and Dorian in letters and I honestly cant tell if any of it was important. I assume that the Dagger works by taking the life essence of someone else and thats how you call on it to be immortal...? If this is true though, I dont know why it had to be his brother? I also dont know how Dietrich would have survived it...unless Abbadon killed him for some...other reason, and maybe THATS how the dagger works, you stab the person you want to be immortal? Or Dietrich called on the dagger while he was being stabbed and came back after he thought dead? Or MAYBE Dietrich called on it before hand so he already had the power when he died? I dont know. I think its bad writing to set up two cliff hangars/ questions at once. Why did Abbadon kill his brother, and why did Dietrich not die? It's more annoying than interesting.
So thats it! That is my unfortunately long and critical review of a booktuber I highly respect and enjoy. Since Ive followed her for almost two years she has been a big fan of Sanderson, so the fact that this was written before that seems like a red flag for me. It means she may have written this before she had alot of experience with great storytelling. I really wish she would have chosen to revise the book, save it and write one before it, or even split it up and focus on only some of the characters-
OK IM LEAVING THIS IN BECAUSE I COMPLETELY FORGOT ABOUT XODIA! Im leaving it like this because thats how forgettable she was that I didnt remember her until I started talking about focusing on NECESSARY characters lol:
Xodia-
We needed to see her backstory on why she was so alone or isolated or whatever. She for some reason was chosen to go across the sea because of a vision she saw that some reason has to do with her people being destroyed. So they sent a girl who WONT use her powers against humans (and even feels bad against fiends) JUST because she has visions and can heal. I say bad call. Her doomsday vision, as most have said, is completely irrelevant. And shes just imprisoned the whole book and falls for one of the knights. I dont care for this and I feel like shouldnt have even been in this book. She should have just been mentioned by Roland and the Mesidians and maybe taken care of in the sequel.
ANYWAY, back to my closing statement. As I was saying, Brooks should have left some characters out and focused on others leaving Xodia and some other little stories for the future or not included them at all. I dont really care for these characters and there was no growth. Im really sad but I think Brooks has alot of experience since she wrote this and her sequel so I have high hops for her!
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